Prince to Princess
by TragediesPainfulKiss
Summary: A potions accident leaves Severus a woman OOC Warning!
1. Chapter 1

Brewing, for Severus, was like therapy. It was what surely kept him from going on a murderous rampage. Everything about it was heavenly. The colors, the smells, the taste, the texture, even the sound, of a potion, mad him happy. He would actually rather be at an apothecary, than working as potions teacher. And he would rather teach DA than both, but that was out of the question. For now, at least, yes, Albus could be stubborn but no one was as tenacious as He.

Brewing in his office was a time of relaxation, a time to reflect on the day. A time to dream and hope. Brewing filled the gap in his empty life. He checked the clock, twenty more minutes till the order meeting. He was brewing a new potion, but he was sure he would finish before it was time to leave. He added a sprig of myrrh; bemused as the potion turned to pink- he had expected a green color. But that was the fun of brewing, the surprise and mystery. He was happy, if this potion turned out he would cure _Lycanthropy, CURE. It would just add to his already long list of brewing contributions. He inhaled as the potion emitted a strong scent of cotton candy. How peculiar was that? He smiled as it started to twirl without being stirred, how magical. He thought about it for a second, and then decided to add a little grass. That, perhaps, was the mistake._

_BANG! BANG! The cauldron exploded and sent the concoction everywhere. It burned his skin, and he blinded him. He could not think straight, but he still had sense enough to try and avoid the still flying goo. He was not very successful, however. Finally he fell to his knees, and crawled toward his bathroom, undressed quickly, and jumped in the shower. He was panicked, something had gone wrong, and he needed to get that potion off- not to mention the fact that it burned awfully. _

_The water enveloped him in warmth, and he scrubbed roughly to get the pink stuff off. He had to rip the patches of pink off; however, they stuck to his skin like mad. The pain increased as he ripped patch after patch off. He was concerned; he could taste something in his mouth and was afraid he had swallowed it. It was never good to swallow and untested potion. The world twisted around him, but he remained standing. He had to clean himself off. He yanked the goo from his hair, and then the vomiting started. In a way he was glad, his body was getting rid of whatever he had swallowed. But he did not enjoy the feeling of puking. Especially this kind, it felt as if he pucking his insides out. He could not even move, not that there would be any point to it. This was more efficient, he vomited and it just washed down the drain. He was miserable, and was forced to sink to his knees, and to hold his stomach as the vomiting increased. It was the worst hour or so of his life, but finally he passed out. _

He awoke to voices, they sounded concerned. However, they did not sound like Poppy, and that confused him. He tried to sit up, but was held down by strong arms. He still felt sick, he was absolutely miserable. He tried to open his eyes, or even speak, but was incapable at the moment.

"What do you think he did to her?" Asked a manly voice.

"I don't know, but she looks real bad.' A woman's voice.

Severus was confused, who looked bad?

"Sirius, are you SURE you found her in his rooms?" That was Dumbledore's voice- no mistake.

"Positive, I went to get Snape like you said, and I then I found her." The first voice said.

"Hmmm, we'll have to ask her about it when she awakes." Albus said calmly.

"Shouldn't we get her to 's?" The woman's voice asked, concerned.

"Wait, I think she's moving." Black said.

Severus wiggled, whatever was cushioning his head was very warm and soft, but he had to sit up, and see where he was.

"Hey, hey, don't sit up. Take it easy." Sirius's voice came from behind him, and sounded very close.

"Let. Me. Go." He spat, quickly sitting up, and opening his eyes.

He wished he had not done so. He was in Black's house, and Tonks, the Weasly's, Black, Albus, Potter, Granger, and Remus were there. Surrounding him, looking confused and worried.

"Hey, come on, lean back." Sirius said.

"What the hell happened?" He spat, looking down at himself. He was covered in a blanket- the only thing hiding the fact he was naked. He turned his head; Black had been the one keeping him down. The pillow had been a lap Severus panicked; something did not feel right about his body.

Molly spoke, kneeling down in front of him. He subconsciously scooted further away from Black and wrapped the blanket closer.

"We were hoping you could tell us, dear. Did someone hurt you?" Her eyes were concerned.

"I swear, if that greasy git did this, I'll hex him to the moon and back." Black sounded off.

"What the hell is wrong with you, you arrogant flea-bag!" He spat.

**Sirius was confused, what the hell had he done to make her so angry. **

"**Hey, I was just being nice." He replied softly. The lady must be scared, he figured, and freaking out. **

"**Go to hell, I don't need YOUR help!" She sprang to her feet; Sirius tried to stop her, but was to slow. She swayed slightly and then fell back, as he had expected. He quickly caught her, like a gentlemen should, and restrained her as she woke an tried to wiggle free.**

"**Let me go!" She screeched, kicking.**

"**Calm down!" Molly urged. "Were trying to help you."**

"**I don't need help, I need to go home! Let me go, dog!" **

**Sirius let go in surprise. How did she know his animagi form? **

**The woman toppled forward, but managed to stay up this time. **

**She glared around the room, she looked very angry.**

"**Who the hell brought me here?" She demanded.**

"**Why, Sirius did. He found you in your bathroom, unconscious." Albus said, placating. **

"**I was fine, you should have left me."**

**Sirius was a little irritated now, the woman was hot, but she was being ungrateful. "The bathroom was covered in puke, and you were passed out. Excuse me for assuming you needed some help. It's not often I find woman in Snape's rooms like that." He spat.**

**The girl glared. "When the hell have you ever been in my rooms?" The girl narrowed her eyes, and looked daggers at him. **

"**Your rooms" "I think you may be confused." Albus said, gently.**

"**What are you all going on about!" The lady yelled. Everybody was looking at her confused. **

"**Maybe she's insane." Ron whispered. **

"**She? Crazy?" She asked vehemently, glaring at Ron. **

**She pulled her robed closer, and then a panicked look crossed his face.**

"**She?" She asked again. **

**When no one answered, she ran to the mirror hanging on the wall.**

**Sirius watched as she looked, looking more and more horrifies as time passed. Finally she broke the silence by shrieking. **

"**What the hell happened?" She screeched. **

**The voice was so shrill it hurt Sirius's ears.**

**The lady looked down at her wrapped up body, and looked even more scared.**

"**Where's my wand! I need to fix this now!" She demanded.**

"**What-"Albus started.**

"**Now! Where. Is. My. Wand. The potion must of gone wrong. "**

**Sirius caught the surprise on Dumbledore's face. "Severus?"**

**And more to his chagrin the woman answered, "Who else would it be? Look, the sooner I fix this the better."**

**Sirius could not believe it. Severus had been lying in his lap.**

"Your wands still where you left it." Sirius said.

"Why the hell didn't you grab it?" He was annoyed and close to panicking.

"Well excuse me, I wasn't think straight. Would you rather I have left you in the shower?" He hissed.

"Yes, actually."

"You're the most ungrateful, little-"

"Enough." Albus said.

Severus continued his glare, but turned to Albus.

"Severus, I will take you upstairs and fix this, all right?"

Severus nodded.

"Molly?" Albus asked.

"You can use the bathroom upstairs." She said, with a confused look still on her face.

Severus hurried up the stairs after Albus, eager to have this fixed. He was glad Albus was here, he had no idea himself how to fix this.

"Sit there." Albus said pointing to the toilet. He sank quickly down.

"Can you disrobe please?"

Severus blushed, but complied. He turned even redder as he took in the breasts and other part.

Albus turned dark too. But he said nothing, as he waved his wand around. Severus was a little concerned as it took longer than ten minutes, but he believed in Albus. Albus could fix anything.


	2. Chapter 2

**What do you mean you can't undo THIS?" Black flinched as the screech carried down the steps. He had been wondering what was taking so long, but he did not have to guess for long. "Are you serious?" The lady/Severus screamed. **

**He could not hear what Albus was saying, but Sirius could conclude that it was not calming Severus down.**

**Albus hurried down the steps.**

"**What happened?" Remus asked. Sirius could tell Albus look flustered.**

"**Severus is a little…upset right at this moment." He said calmly. Sirius saw a scratch on his face.**

"**Are you all right?"**

"**Why yes, Sirius, it's just a little scratch. I am sure he'll calm down in a minute or so."**

**There came an enraged scream from up the stairs. "Are you sure, Albus?"**

"**Is anyone ever really sure of anything, Sirius?" Dumbledore said calmly, fixing the scratch on his face. **

**Sirius however was not so sure, and he could tell by the looks on everyone else's face that they were not sure either.**

"**Maybe you should go get him- er her." Molly said, worriedly. **

"**Severus…is rather worked up at the moment." Albus said, with a weird expression on her face.**

"**Are you…afraid?" Sirius asked. Since when had Albus been afraid of anything?**

"**Not afraid, however I find I am rather hesitant to upset Severus further."**

"**But you're not afraid of anything." Harry said.**

"**Harry, the notion that I do not fear anything is silly." Albus said kindly. **

"**I'll get her- him." Sirius offered. **

"**I would not advise that, but if you do chose to undertake that option, be careful."**

"**I can handle Snape." He said, starting up the steps.**

"**Be careful." Molly warned.**

**Sirius started up the steps, "He doesn't even have his wand. It'll be fine."**

**He banged on the bathroom door. "I'm coming in." He called, and turned the knob. Only to find it was locked. "Open up!"**

"**Go the fuck away mutt!" **

"**I'm serious! Open up."**

"**Go! AWAY!" he/she yelled in a choked up voice.**

**He kicked the door, and then pulled out his wand, unlocking the door.**

**He threw it open, and saw her/him sitting on the floor in the corner, tears on her face.**

"**Get out!" She screeched. **

"**This isn't your house. Albus wants you downstairs. Move." He commanded. **

"**I don't have to listen to you- you- stupid mutt." She said crying. **

**Sirius knew she was upset, but he had little sympathy for the ingrate. He walked over to her and stood, towering.**

"**I'm not a messenger. I'm a deliverer." He said, reaching down and throwing her over her shoulder. It would not have been hard, but she kicked and screamed bloody murder. The kicked landed in his stomach and he almost dropped her, but he maintained his grip and started down the steps.**

**She clawed and even bit at his shoulder. "Let me go! You son of a bitch!" **

**He ignored her and continued on. She was not making this easy, she wiggled and Sirius did not want to either drop her or cause the blanket to fall from her.**

"**I'll kill you!" She screeched. Clawing his face, and kneeing his stomach. **

"**Shit!" He exclaimed, but he maintained his grip.**

**She gave a howl of rage, and fought harder as he took the last step and turned to the living room.**

"**I'm going to cut you so deep!" She spat.**

'**Whatever." He said, finally entering the living room.**

"**Albus, tell this flea-bitten mongrel to let me go!" She hissed.**

"**Do you realize how immature you look right now?" Sirius hissed at her.**

**This was not a smart move. Severus's magic went mad, and a vase almost smacked into his knees.**

**He knew it was not her fault, but he threw her down on the couch, "What the hell is wrong you?"**

**She quickly jumped up and lunged toward him. However, she was still weak on her feet, and Sirius easily grabbed her and got her in a hold.**

"**Now, Severus calm down." Albus started.**

"**Let me go! Let me go!" She flailed and new tears started to fall down. **

**Sirius held his grip. He did not want to get clawed again. Even if he did feel bad for the now beautiful woman, he was not about to get hurt for her.**

"**He'll let you go as soon as you calm yourself." Molly said.**

"**You want me to calm down? Are you mad? Look at me!" **

**She kicked at Sirius again, and started to wiggle harder. **

"**Trust me, were looking at you. It's hard to ignore a screaming lunatic." Sirius spat.**

"**Sirius enough, she's obviously upset enough." Arthur scolded.**

**The lady gave a howl of rage again, but instead of kicking, went limp, and started panting and sweating.**

"**I- Stupid mutt- let." She panted, sinking to the floor.**

**Albus rushed forward and Sirius lowered her to the couch.**

"**See, you've over taxed your strength. You're still pretty weak." Albus said.**

"**Here, drink this." Molly said, giving her a glass of water.**

**The girl glared at him, but took the water. "Thanks." She breathed.**

**She chugged the entire glass quickly. **

"**Where is my wand, I'm going home." She demanded, holding out her long, white hand.**

"**Severus, I don't want you alone tonight. Why don-"Albus began.**

"**My mother is going to kill me when she sees me." She whispered, a horrified expression crossing her face.**

"**Severus calm down." Molly said.**

**She shook her head, and buried her face in her hands.**

**Molly sunk on the couch beside her and hugged her.**

"**You're all right dearie. Just breathe." Molly coached.**

**The rest of the room had scared looks on their faces- as if Severus were a ticking time bomb.**

"**Take me to my mother's house." She said, sounding scared.**

**Albus nodded, and held out his hand.**

**Sirius watched as the woman slowly got to her feet, and tumbled forward. Sirius quickly caught her, and gently helped her to walk to Albus.**

**She turned even whiter, and leaned against Albus.**

"**Good night." Albus said, with a quick look around. **

**Everyone muttered there byes, and Sirius watched as Albus appirated away, holding tightly to Severus.**


	3. Chapter 3

Severus did not want to be a woman. He did not want to go to his Mothers. All he wanted to do was cry. But that was not an option. Albus helped him to the mansion, down the long drive way. They walked in silence and Severus was glad.

Finally they arrived at the door, and Albus knocked, on the huge ornate door. Severus frowned. He hated this house. When his father had died, when he was 15, his mother remarried a pure-blood. He had hated his father, but he at least had a few good things to say about his step-father.

The door was opened by his mother. He eyes narrowed when she took in Albus. "What?" She hissed. "Do you realize what time it is?"

"I apologize, but if you'll let us come in, I'll explain everything to you."Albus said calmly.

"It's late." His mother hissed.

"Mum, it's me." Severus breathed. He was getting dizzy, and it was harder to stand.

The older witch glared at him.

"Severus." He whispered.

Realization dawned her face. "What the hell did you do to yourself?" She hissed, looking around quickly. "Get inside, now, before someone sees."

Albus helped him to enter into the huge manor. He was still only in a blanket and his feet were bare. He was a bit chilled but did not complain.

"Rephaim! Come here!" His mother hissed.

Severus leaned heavily against Albus, as they waited for his step-father to come. Finally the big red-head arrived and glared at the guest.

"Eileen, it's rather late for guests, wouldn't you say?'" He asked irritation in his voice.

"It's Severus, Rephaim." She whispered, sounding embarrassed.

His step-father's face looked dubious, but as soon as he sensed they were serious, he turned red. "Get him to the living room." He spat at Albus.

Albus and Severus made their way slowly to the couch, and after they arrived, he gratefully sank to the couch.

"What the hell did you do, boy?" His step-father hissed.

"It was a potions accident, Rephaim." He hissed. He was not a boy, and this was not his fault.

"I'm your father boy! You will address me as such!" Rephaim yelled in his face.

He glared at his step-father but held his tongue. Slytherin's did not talk back to their 'parents.'

"Why haven't you fixed him?" His mother hissed at Albus.

"I've tried, perhaps in a week or so my spells will reverse it, but for now nothing can be done." Albus was calm.

"How could you be so stupid?" Rephaim yelled.

"I didn't do it on purpose, dad!" He yelled.

"The ball is in a week! What are we going to do?" His mother asked.

Rephaim hugged his mother. "We'll fix this Eileen. It's okay." He turned to Albus. "You can leave now."

Severus really did not want Albus to leave, but he could not ask him to stay.

"Be sure he gets some rest, he's going to be weak for awhile." Albus said. "Good night."

Severus watched Albus leave, and then turned to his mother and 'father.'

His mother and father were clearly angry.

"We'll have to talk to Elcho." His father said. "I'll floo him now."

His mother turned to him, and glared." Get to bed." She ordered.

Severus nodded, and stood up. She thought she had regained a little strength just sitting there, but she toppled to the ground.

"Here" his father said, scooping him up, and carrying him away. His father was not abusive and he was happy for that. "I got you." He said, softly.

His father lifted him to his bedroom, and set him on the bed. "Are you going to be okay?" He asked.

Severus nodded, and once he got under the sheets and blankets, his father left.

"Good night, than."

"Good night, Dad."

Severus quickly fell asleep, he was weak and tired, and did not even try to stay awake and listen in one his parents and Elcho's conversation. Sleep stole him away and he was glad for it, dreams were his escape.

He must have been asleep for awhile. When he awoke the birds were chirping, and the sun poked out from the curtains. He sat up slowly; he was groggy and did not feel that great. He had forgotten for a second the change that had occurred, but was reminded when he went to shower. He wanted to just disappear; life was never fair to him. The water bathed him in warmth, and he tried not to think so much.

Exiting the shower, he was faced with a minor dilemma. What was he going to wear, downstairs? A blanket? That would not be fitting. Finally he had to just settle on a robe. He quickly donned the clothing, wanting to cover up his new body, and crept down the steps slowly.

"Severus, is that you? Hurry up." His father called.

He quickened his pace, and went to the kitchen as fast as he could move. He has been expecting his parents to be there, but no Elcho. He blushed red as the preacher blanched at his robe.

"Severus Tobias!" His mother roared, red in the face.

"You go upstairs now, and put on the clothes your mother laid for you!" His father hissed.

Severus had not seen any clothes, laid out. But he did not argue, he rushed out of the kitchen, his mother trailing behind. He quickly rushed into his room.

"Mom, I'm changing. You can leave now." He said politely.

His mother gave him a sharp look. "You'll need help, trust me dear." She said kindly.

Severus raised an eyebrow and turned away- confused, he looked around for some robes.

He looked for awhile but gave up frustrated.

"What clothes?" He asked.

His mother smiled, and went over into the bathroom. She returned with something blue in her hands.

"Put this on- no arguments. Or I will get your father." She threw the bundle on his bed. He walked cautiously over to It., and blushed red when he saw the bundle contained a bra.

"I am NOT putting this on Mum."

His mother gave him a 'look.' "Yes, you will. And hurry, Elcho is waiting." She demanded.

"I want men's clothes." He insisted.

"You are not a man right now, it would not be fitting." She hissed.

Severus glared at his mother, she glared back.

"I will get your father."

Severus glared, if his father became involved that would be bad. He did not want to make Elcho mad either. "I'll put this on." He said brandishing the blue bundle. "But not the bra and panties."

"I have little patience Severus, do as I say, and do it now!"

Severus glared, but saw he was not getting his way. "How?" He asked, holding up the bra.


	4. Chapter 4

Severus was not happy, and he simply could not see how a woman wore the things she did. The bra was awkward and to make matters worse, it had been too small, and his mother had to magic it bigger. The panties were uncomfortable and itchy, and left no breathing room. The dress was the worst; he had never felt gayer in his life. It hugged his body and was hot; he could hardly breathe in it, especially with the girdle thing on.

"There we go." His mother said, after he had slipped some flat shoe things.

Severus glared at her; he did not even bother to look in the mirror. As soon as Elcho left, he was going to get into a pair of boxers, and slip off this dress.

They hurried to the kitchen and Severus and his mother sat.

The priests white hair shone in the morning light, and he looked as imposing as ever.

"Good day, Severus. I understand there has been an accident."

Severus blushed, but nodded.

Elcho took a slow drink of his coffee. "Your parents and I have come up with what is to be done. Until you change back that it is, or if."

"When." Severus insisted. There was no way he would be stuck like this forever.

The priest gave him a look. "Don't talk back."

Severus blushed. "Sorry."

Severus needed to remember his manners; one did not speak over the priest or correct him.

"As you know, Severus, a man cannot walk about as a girl, and vice versa. It is not fitting at all. As this is so, you cannot walk about in men's clothing or do as males do. It would be unacceptable."

"What…exactly do you mean?" Severus did not want to ask-he wanted to run. He knew exactly what it meant.

The priest gave him a look. "It means that, until the potion wears off, you are female, and must ask as one. That is all. Good day." He got up and left, and Severus felt his heart sink to his stomach. This was not fair. He wanted to tell the priest no, to just run and hide, but that was not an option. He looked forlornly down and the table- why couldn't things work out for him, for once?

"Here eat up." His mother pushed a plate toward him, he sighed.

"I'm going home." He said, pushing the plate back.

"You heard what Elcho said, no men's clothes." His mother said strictly.

He nodded, "I know."

His mother got up, and hugged him. "It'll be okay, Severus. It's just for awhile."

Severus hugged back hard; he hoped his mother was right.

"But before you go, Sev, come upstairs with me."

Severus did as requested and once they were inside his mothers and fathers room, his mother sat him down in her bathroom.

He sat in front on a stool, and was finally forced to look at himself. His hair was long and black, wavy and beautiful. His eyes had gotten wider- looking doe like. They were pretty and long lashed framed his face. His skin was white as always, but now it seemed to glow. His lips were thicker- redder, and his nose was not hooked anymore. It was smooth and long. He hated it, he wanted himself back. Looking at his body was worse. He was well-endowed on top, triple D, his mother had said. Whatever that meant. He was skinny also, as usual.

His mother broke him out of his thoughts, with a hand on his hair. "Woman wear make-up, luv." She had said it gently.

Severus nodded, and the next hour was spent with his mother painting his face up, and telling him how to do so.

"So pretty." His mother said.

Severus looked, his eyelashes were even longer, his lips more red, his eyes lined with sapphire blue along with his lids.

"Before you go," His mother thrust a bag at him," I had Rephaims house elf go out and get some things for you."

Severus nodded, "Thanks mum."

His mother patted his cheek. "Cheer up, things will get better."

Severus just nodded.

Once he was home he immediately went to his books. He would fix this as soon as possible. But three hours passed before he realized the books would not help. No one had even tried what he had, and he had been foolish and not kept notes on what he was doing.

He gave a frustrated yell and chucked a book at the wall. He rolled over in his bed, and glared. Life was giving him so many lemons; there would never be enough sugar to make lemonade. Why was it the people who worked the hardest got nothing, and the ones who were arrogant morons, got everything handed to them on silver platters? Why him? What was so wrong about him? He sighed, the answers would not leap from the sky, he would just have to hope and pray the potion would go.

Angry tears burn his eyes, and he wiped them hurriedly. He growled when he saw his fingers smeared with the make-up crap. He looked at the bundle of make-up and clothes his mother had given him and threw it to the floor, and then jumped off the bed, and to the shower. He stripped fast, and let the water wash the mask off. Let himself feel the warmth of water, instead of the anger of unfairness. He scrubbed his face hard, eradicating any trace of blush or eye shadow. He scrubbed till his skin ached, and finally he emerged.

He looked at the mirror, half expecting that he scrubbed so hard, the potion had been washed out. But a woman still stared at him. He screamed enraged and punched the mirror. He rarely lost his temper, but now he gave in to the rage.

He hurried into his room and threw on the stupid women's clothes. Blood still dripping. He wanted boxers and pants, not this crap.

He raced downstairs still angry. He threw a vase or two in the living room, and then started screaming and tossing tables over. Anything that he could lift he broke. He pulled out his wand and blasted things, shattering wood.

Finally he lay on his back at the floor, panting. Someone appirated, he did not bother to even get up. Who cared who saw him? Elcho knew, and that meant Lucius did, and that meant Voldemort did, and the Sirius knew, which meant the whole order knew. What was the point of hiding?


	5. Chapter 5

"Hello?"

Severus did not turn to look toward the voice, just stared at the ceiling. "What?" He spat.

Footsteps came close, light and careful.

"Are you…okay?" It was Tonks.

"What do you want?" He snarled, he was in no mood for pity.

"Are you okay?" She repeated.

"I'm fine. Just an earthquake." He let his voice soak with sarcasm.

"An earthquake?"

"Yup."

He smirked; he did not feel better however. He was in another damn dress, after all.

"What do you want?" He repeated.

"Remus sent me for his Wolfsbane potion…"

Severus sighed and sat up. He looked at the damage, it was worse than he though. He stood and went to get the potion, than came back, and thrust it at her.

"Here" He blushed, enraged, as Tonks eyed him.

"Take a picture, it last longer!" He started to storm away.

"Look, I don't know what your problem is!" She yelled.

"My problem? Are you mad? I'm a damn woman now, and it doesn't help that the whole damn wizarding world is pointing and laughing. THAT is my problem."

"That's dumb! You can't possibly know every witch or wizard-"

"It's obviously an expression, genius." He glared.

"You know that your problem is, actually? You take all your problems out on everyone else!" Tonks yelled, her hair flamed red.

Severus was angry. "You know what your problem is? You're a naïve, and privileged."

Tonks looked indignant, than smirked. "Indignant, privileged? You don't know me. And you know what else" She leaned in closer, "I really don't care what you think of me. And you should try to do the same."

"What do you know?" Severus retorted.

"I know that you lash out at people because you're scared." Tonks was smug.

"Scared? Hardly." He spat, he would not ever admit to being scared. Being scared was for the weak.

"Whatever." Tonks just turned and left, without another word.

Severus was glad; he didn't need her to preach at him. He was fine without constant criticism. He was fine alone; he didn't deserve any better, after all.

He hated himself even more as a woman. At least as a man he was as ugly as he was on the inside. The pretty woman he was now, was a lie. His insides were dark and dreary, not the beauty that was now painted on his outsides.

He wanted to cry, to scream, to yell till his longs burned. But he did neither. Instead he got up and went to his closet. Slowly, and quietly- he was going to retrieve his friend. He opened the doors, and reached a hand up to the top shelve. He pulled down an old wooden box. He had not opened it up since he was 23. Now, though, he needed it. He breathed in the scent of wood, and opened the lid slowly. Everything was as he had left it. He smiled down at the shining razor, the glittering pocket knife, and the pieces of glass. He took in a deep breath, and took up his favorite. So jagged, and clear, his favorite piece of glass. This kind of friendship lasted forever. He sat down in the closet, loving the darkness. He held the box, careful, in his lap. He did not want his precious tools to be harmed.

He had not done this in years, but the urge was too strong to fight. He took his friend in his left hand, and brought it to his right arm. He relished the anticipated, and pushed down-hard. He had only meant to do two or three, but he kept going. All they way to ten, after that he stopped, and carefully hid his box beneath his bed. He swiped at the blood, but let it leak. His tools had been bewitched- magic could not heal the wounds they made, not that that bothered him. He would cover them up later- when he had to leave and go to the Death Eater meeting. Right now, he could sit on his bed, and stare and the red corn rows.

Time passed quickly, when you were in deep reverie. And he braced himself as he donned his death eater clothes. He loved the feel of the fabric rubbing against his right arm; it gave him a feeling- other than emptiness.

He did not want to go in, sure they would all know, but they would still point and laugh. Nothing new, not for him anyways. He took his wand out and appirated, and walked in the Malfoy manor. He slowly opened the door, and walked in to the huge room that had been designated for the meetings. As expected the moment he walked in all eyed were on him. Crabbe and Goyle's mouths dropped open and Avery actually had the nerve to give a low whistle. The worst, though, was when Voldemort practically eye raped him. That was until Bellatrix gave the Dark Lord a sharp look.

"Right then, shall we start?" He hissed, his snake slithering up to sit on his lap.

Severus quickly sat, and soon wished the dark lord would discover he was a spy and kill him. The whole time he was being eye balled, and he had never been so uncomfortable in his life. To top it off Bellatrix looked like she was ready to cut his throat. He shot back glare after glare at her- this was not his fault. And whatever that dumb witch had going on with the dark lord was just plain wrong. Finally, after what seemed like hours, it was over. He quickly rushed out as fast as possible, practically running outside and to the gate.

"Hey! Wait!" Severus did not want to stop, but he turned to see Avery rushing up.

He glared. "What?" He drawled.

Avery gave him a look that made his skin crawl. He stepped back a little.

"Hey, don't be scared." Avery hissed, actually having the audacity to touch him.

He pulled back further.

Avery smiled. "Hey, listen. I said don't be scared."

"What the hell do you want?" Severus asked, reaching for his wand.

Avery noticed. He shot out a hand and grabbed Severus's.

"What the hell-"

"Shh," He said squeezing his wrist, "Listen, now that you're a chick and all, I was thinking you'd like to get with me. If you catch my drift."

Avery had stepped way to close. Severus brought up his other hand and grabbed Avery by the back of his hair, and brought his head down on his own knee.

"Don't you ever touch me again, or I swear I'll castrate you permanently. "

Avery was on the ground, blood dripping from his nose. Severus just turned and left, feeling no guilt at all.


	6. Chapter 6

Three days had past, and Severus was starting to expect that this was permanent. And even though he knew that good Slytherin women did not drink- he was going to get hammered. Starting with some delicious vodka. Yeah, firewhiskey was good, but he liked to start things off with vodka. He grabbed the bottle, and relishing the anticipation, threw it back and chugged like there was no tomorrow. One lucky thing he had gotten from his father was the ability to drink and drink and not throw up get hang over's. The one downside being it took a lot to get him as drunk as he wanted. He would just have to keep going. Soon, after his second bottle of vodka, he decided to switch it up.

"Gonna go get me some firewhiskey." He sang to no one. He did to the firewhiskey as he had to the vodka.

He laughed when he got the end, and grabbed another bottle. However he did not throw it back. He just decided to go for a walk. Around the block, at night. In his nightie. He did not care, though. He needed some air.

As he walked barefoot in the grass, a car drove by. Blaring a song. Severus sang along. "Who let the dawgs out? Who? Who?" He laughed, muggles.

Dogs, why did that piss him off? That was right, Sirius. Stupid mutt, stupid Gryffindor. Everything about him was stupid. He stomped down the sidewalk- getting more angry by the minute. Finally he decided the dumb mutt needed to know how stupid he was. He started back toward his house, and stomped inside. He pulled his wand out and appirated to the burrow. Black had been spending the night there lately.

He was sure he was sober, maybe tipsy, but sober. He marched right up to the door and slammed it open. Still clutching his bottle of alcohol, he marched into the living room.

The Weasly's were all there along with Potter and Granger, and the damn mutt. "Youu…" He spat, brandishing the bottle at him.

"Severus!" Molly was clearly surprised. "I wasn-"

"Molly, shh. I gotta tell Sewius something…" He walked forward.

_To say Sirius was surprised was an understatement. Snape was drunk, and Snape was never wild. Now, though, he was stumbling and clearly irate._

"_Severus are you okay?" Molly asked._

"_Finne. But you," she said, pointing the bottle again at him, "You are the MOST pretentious, arrogant…arrogant mutt. That is what you areeee." She drawled._

_Sirius smirked, this was amusing. "YOU are drunk." He said. The children laughed._

"_Yeah its all funny!"_

_Sirius flinched at the now raised voice. _

"_Sev-" Molly began._

"_Everyone just laugh at Severus. Is so funny when things happen to himmm. HaHA! Why don we just keeppp messing with him- maybe he'll kill hemslef. Make everone happy. Fuck you black." She started waving the bottle around and swayed. _

"_How much have you DRUNk?" He asked._

"_What do you care. Had a few bottles is all."_

_She swayed, her eyes were narrowed. Molly started to get up and go toward her. _

"_Don't touch me." She spat._

_Sirius looked at the bottle, it was nearly gone._

"_just some vodka and firewhiskyy. Fine." _

_Her slurring was just awful. She could hardly stand._

"_Severus maybe you should sit down." Molly said kindly._

"_What the hell you care Mowly. All I am is for people to use. No one cawes. Just a pawn." She was clearly irate now, and Sirius was kind of worried. _

"_I hate everybody! I hate Albus I hate my mother, and you-" She pointed at Black, "I ESPECIALLT hate you." She looked angry, and tears welled up in her eyes._

_Sirius did not really know what to say. Girls always seemed to get mad at him when he broke up with them, but this seemed totally random. _

"_Ughh I hate you so much! Look at me I;m Sirius fucking Black and I keep fucking up but everyone love me!" _

_Sirius was almost scared. She was crying now and clearly freaking out. She was sobbing now._

"_Uh, hey, calm down." Sirius said, so smoothly._

"_Don't tell me what to do! I'm not a FUCKING puppet!"_

_Sirius flinched, and the kids all snuck upstairs. Clearly Severus was not only angry at him._

"_Okay. Severus you need to sit." Molly said, grabbing her arm. _

"_I don't need to do ANYHTING!" She pulled away from Molly, but stumbled, and crashed to the floor hard. The bottle shattered and then Severus really started to cry. She went in a fetal position and just started sobbing. "I hate you I hate you I hate you." She sobbed._

"_Severus!" Molly knelt down and wrapped her arms around her. "Shhh, calm down now, your okay." She murmured. _

"_I hate myself so much." _

"_Shh, your smart and loyal." Molly said, rubbing her hair. _

_The sobbing was so loud, Sirius had to do something. He got up and went to Severus's other side. He knelt and put a strong arm around her. _

"_I hate you." She murmured. Sirius finally noticed that she wasn't saying it to him. He saw her arms. _

"_What the hell did you do?" He pulled her arm out. She tried to fight, but it was futile. _

"_Severus, Oh my Goodness." Molly said._

_Severus looked Sirius right in the eyes. "I wanted to keep going. I really wanted to. I wasn't going to stop. I wanted to keep going." She whispered._

"_What have you done to yourself?" Molly asked. The girl just shook with sobs. Sirius tightened his grip and to his surprise she leaned up, heavily against him. _

"_You're warm." She muttered. _

"_Sirius hold her." Molly commanded. Sirius did as told, the girl was clearly hysterical. Molly returned within seconds, and grabbed Severus's arms. The woman did not pull away as Sirius would have guessed. Molly waved her wand and the wounds stayed._

"_These from bewitched blades, aren't they?" She asked._

_Severus nodded, and buried her face in his chest. Sirius flinched at the marks, they were nasty. What was going on in her head?_

_Molly sighed, and took some wrap and ointment and bound the wounds. Shaking her head, and looking sad. _

"_Sirius take her to your house, to sleep. She shouldn't be alone."_

_Sirius nodded, and tried to tug the girl up. She, however, stayed wrapped up in a ball. Sirius sighed, and bent, lifting the woman up with him. She stayed stiff and hard._

"_Good night Molly." _


	7. Chapter 7

_The woman groaned once Sirius had appirated. He felt a tad sorry for her, being full of alcohol and what-not. _

"_Where we?" She slurred._

_Sirius started up the stairs. "My house. You're going to bed." He said firmly._

_He expected the woman to argue- she was Snape after all. Instead she nodded, and let her head rest on his chest._

"_I have another drink firs?" She slurred, lifting her glorious, large eyes to his._

"_No."_

_Severus just made a noise of disappointment but did not struggle as he opened the door to an extra bedroom. _

"_Here" He lay her down gently, and pulled the covers over her. _

_He then went downstairs and stared at the fire for a while. Thinking and just dreaming. He eventually went to sleep in his own bed, and had drifted off into warm sleep when he was awoken. Something was not right. He could not hear or see anything out of order however. That is, until he sat up. Lying next to him was Severus._

"_What the hell?" He spat._

_The woman wearily opened her eyes, and smiled. _

"_The dark was scary. It's safe here. With you." She whispered._

_Sirius frowned, her eyes were still somewhat glassy though. That being the case, he just started to leave for another room._

_A hand shot out and caught him._

"_Stay with me." The voice sounded scared._

_Sirius sighed, and turned. A pair of large black eyes caught his. He did not want too, but he crept back in the bed._

_He had to remember that this was not gay, she was a woman now. _

"_Just for the night." She whispered. _

_Sirius just nodded. _

Severus woke up slowly and groggily. He could taste vodka and firewhiskey on the back of his mouth and groaned. It was never good when he drank. He groaned, he needed a shower bad. He opened his eyes up slowly, and when he saw Sirius laying next to him, he nearly had a heart attack. He quickly pulled away and rolled of the bed. He stood up quickly, and swatted and Sirius. The mutt just growled, and rolled away.

"Wake. Up. Now!" He yelled, hitting with each word.

"Ugh, what you want?" Sirius asked, finally sitting up.

Severus gestured at the bed, and then at him. "What the hell happened?" He asked. He was a tad worried.

"YOU got sloshed and Molly made me drag your ass here."

Severus let out the breath he had been holding.

Sirius smirked. "Nice to know how you REALLY feel about me."

Severus's face lost all color, had they…? His nightie was still on- which was good. But he could not feel his panties.

Sirius noticed. "Wait. You don't think that we- NO!" Sirius laughed hard.

"Shut the hell up. You're a horny mutt; of course I'd think you would try something."

Sirius just laughed harder. "I would never- not with you."

Severus was getting pissed. "If we didn't do it, where are my panties?"

Sirius smirked. "You woke up at 3 in the morning and took them off- they were 'riding up.'"

Severus blushed. "Stop laughing. I could do the brains out of anyone."

"Do? What are you, eleven? Call it what it is." Sirius said.

"Fine," Severus moved right up to the bed, and put his face inched from Sirius's, "I could FUCK the brains out of anyone." He whispered.

"Doubt it." Sirius snorted.

Severus had no reason for what he did next. Maybe it was all the new estrogen and hormones coursing through him, or maybe it was the need to prove himself. Either way, he moved closer and kissed Black- hard. By the time he registered what he had done, and was expecting Black to punch him, Sirius had pulled him on top of him and rolled over. Black was now on top of him and kissing him back just as hard.

Severus knew he should pull away, but passion burned within him.

"Gonna put your money where your mouth is." Sirius said, looking in his eyes.

Severus nodded and gave in.

_Sirius rolled over and panted hard. That had been the best two hours of his life. Sweat dripped from him._

_Severus lay on her back, sweat also dripping. _

_He smirked and turned on his side to face her. "I have to admit that was pretty good, but I think my brains are still intact."_

_The woman frowned, and then grinned mischievously. "Guess I'll just have to try again." _

_Sirius grinned, if it was a repeat of what had just happened, he would go all day._

"_If you think you're up to it." He said._

_Severus raised a black eyebrow. "Brace yourself, mutt. Were doing it MY way this time."_

Severus and Sirius had just been lying there, panting. When the sound of someone downstairs startled them. Severus quickly turned to Sirius.

"Quick, get dressed."

Severus did as commanded. He quickly tugged his bra on, and threw his nightie on.

"My panties." He whispered.

"Forget them."

The sound of footsteps on the steps made Severus freeze.

"Shit, get under the bed!" Sirius said.

"What?"

Sirius gave him a sharp look as Remus called out. "Hello? Sirius?"

Severus panicked, and quickly crawled under the bed.

Great, just great. Damn, were wolf just HAD to chose this moment for a social call.

He held his breath as the door opened.

He listened carefully, looking out and seeing feet.

"Hey Sirius, just wanted to see if you were in for a friendly game of poker." Remus said.

"Umm, yeah, but right now is not a goo-" Sirius stammered.

Someone gasped. "Were you? Is there?" It was Tonks, who sounded amused. "Who is it?" She asked.

Severus felt the blood drain from his face.

"I don't know what you're talking about. " Sirius was trying to sound nonchalant, he was failing miserably.

"Don't lie! Who is it?" Tonks giggled.

"Tonks, that's personal." Remus scolded.

Tonks made a dismissive noise, and Severus panicked as he watched feet start to walk around the room.

'Hey, there is NO one here." Sirius insisted.

Tonks was having none of it.

"Really?" She asked. "Then whose thong is this?"

Sirius just spluttered.

Severus held his breathe, and moved as far back as possible. Tonks was looking everywhere.

"Sirius has a girlfriend." Tonks sang, opening the closet.

Remus laughed. "Come on mate, tell me."

"There is no one here."

Severus rolled his eyes, Sirius sucked at lying.

"Liar Liar, pants on fire." Tonks said, she dropped to her knees. Severus panicked; she was right next to the bed.

The red covers lifted and looking him right in the face was Tonks. Her smile faded for a moment, then a huge grin took its place.

She stood back up.

"She must have left already. Why don't you boys get your game going? I'll be there in a second, I have to use the restroom."


	8. Chapter 8

Severus let out a breath of relief, when Tonks did not give the secret away. However his joy was short lived when Tonks kneeled down and peeked at him.

"The gig is up, come out."

Severus sighed, but crawled out from under the bed, and stood, not looking her in the face.

"Here" Tonks threw his undergarments at him. He caught them and quickly slipped into them.

Tonks had a huge grin on her face. Smugness was obvious.

"It's not what you think." He spat.

Tonks gave him a look. "Is he any good?"

Severus blushed dark red. "We didn't-"

"Oh please."

Severus headed for the door, but Tonks stepped in front of it.

"Tell me more." She demanded, smiling.

Severus rolled his eyes. "What is this Greece?" He spat.

Tonks's eyes widened. "I LOVED that movie."

"Anyone who doesn't is brain-dead."

Tonks nodded. Then leaned in real close. "Tell me more, tell me more." She sang.

Severus gave in; the estrogen must have kicked in.

She quickly started telling the story.

Tonks and her were soon giggling and laughing.

"You actually did that?"

Severus nodded.

"How?"

"You have to take your legs and…" He whispered the rest.

Tonks's eyes widened. "Is it good?"

Severus nodded his black hair flying.

"What is it called?"

"I call it the Severus, I did invent it."

Tonks whispered. "Was he any good?"

Severus nodded.

Tonks laughed.

Severus was in the middle of telling Tonks how to do the 'Basilisk" when Sirius called up the steps.

"What are you two doing?"

"Were talking. Play your game!" Tonks yelled.

"What? With who?"

"Your MOTHER." Severus yelled, making Tonks giggle.

"You whore!" she giggled.

"What? Me? You and Remus most go at it all the time- he is a werewolf."

Tonks blushed red. "Yeah, well your 'friend' is a dog. They have more of a libido."

"They do NOT." Severus argued.

"Why don't we just ask them then?" Tonks had a playful grin on her face.

Severus was about to retort when the door sprang open. Sirius was standing there, suspicion on his face.

"Whatever she told you is a lie." He said, crossing his arms.

Tonks got a coy look on her face, and grinned. She looked at Severus then and met her eyes. Severus could not help it. They both were soon laughing, hard. Tears were streaming down their faces.

"What! What's so funny?" Sirius demanded.

Tonks managed to spit out a few words. "You're bad in bed then?"

Sirius's face turned bright red. "We did not-"

"Oh, please." Tonks said, rolling her eyes.

"Grab your panties, and get out." He snarled at Severus."And don't tell anyone."

Severus's joy washed away. "Don't worry; our escapade was nothing to brag about. It's more of an embarrassment really." She spat, pushing past the mutt, and leaving.

Remus looked up, puzzlement on his face. "Severus? What-"

Severus did not even bother to answer; he just stormed past the lycan and appirated away. That stupid mutt was a complete ass, and a pig. Words could not describe how much that animagi irritated him. He had been so rude. She had given him the best time of his life, and this is how he repaid her? What a pig. Was it just wham bam, thank you Sam? She felt like a whore, and anger burned in her. She had been used, and felt pathetic. He wanted to castrate that stupid mutt. Tears stung at his eyes, to his annoyance, and stormed upstairs to his huge tub. He filled the water to the brim of the huge basin, and filled it with perfumed bubbles. She quickly stripped and hopped in, scrubbing away the filth. Tears fell down, why did all the bad things happen to him. He wiped angrily at the tears, getting more annoyed when the makeup smeared. He was going to cut the damn Gryffindor. He was so ungrateful.

She scrubbed until she was raw and got up from the tub. She wandered out of her bathroom and to her bedroom. Naked, she walked to her balcony and just stared out at the pond. Climbing carefully unto the ledge she sat and stared out at the world. The sun was setting; time had escaped from his at Sirius's house. The beams dried her skin, and her tears. Life was hard, crying did not make it better. Years of tough life had taught him that. The best you could hope for was not really worth hoping for. Some people were meant to have the bad lives, and some the good. Severus had been stuck with the bad. He looked down at his new body, white- so pale. He took notes of all the changes, memorizing his body. He pictured every scar and mark that his parents had left. That Voldemort had left. That he had left. All reminders of how his life lacked happiness. His tattoo caught the sun and glimmered. She took in the blue dragon, beautiful, and curled around her belly. He had done that at fifteen. He thought of his childhood, but quickly stopped- it was not good to depress yourself.

She sighed; her wand was not with her. Otherwise she would accio a cigarette, and a blade. She put of thoughts of the smoke and pushed them away. However, the trellis of roses caught her eyes. Lovely, and obvious. She leaned down, grabbed at them. Every rose had its thorn. She plucked a sharp one out, smirked when it pricked her finger. She had made a new friend. A friend that made red furrows just as well as her glass. She dug viciously, as much as she wanted to cut Sirius. She was having a depressive moment, and that was never good, but what could she do about that. Sometimes you just had to feel your feelings; not just push them away. Sighing, she decided it was time to suck it up and just go for some fire whiskey and vodka. That was the thing that could always make you feel good. That and vodka.

Chugging it down, she finally decided to thorough some garments on- a simple nightie. She was going to get wasted and then pass out. A great way to pass the day.


	9. Chapter 9

Severus woke slowly; he turned and opened his eyes slowly. Where the hell was he? An empty bottle of vodka lay at her side, and she was on the grass. She groaned and sat up. She was on the playground grass of his town. How had she ended up there? Sitting up the sun blinded her and she squinted against the blinding light. Something was wrong, she could feel it. It only took a few seconds for her to realize the needle beside her. Had she shot up? Shit, it had taken forever to stop the first time. Wondering what time it was she looked around. Kids were running about, and it must have been later then noon. Mothers glared as she stumbled away, and walked home. 'Once there she collapsed on her couch and healed her injection wounds. She was pissed- withdrawals would not be easy.

Sound woke her, hours later; she was not on her bed, not her couch. But something was soft beneath her. Sweat poured from her body, and she was trembling. Withdrawals were a bitch. But she would not let herself become addicted again, ever. She groaned, and shook. A soft voice **murmured** something, and she felt a cool rag touch her body.

**Molly frowned at the poor child. She looked absolutely miserable. She shook and shook and sweat dripped down in droves. She moaned and groaned and all Molly could do was give her sleeping potions to try and let her sleep through some of it.**

"**Poor thing.." Muttered Arthur.**

**Molly nodded her agreement. She had been on there couch for a day already- not stirring or moving. **

"**Why does Snape have to be on our couch, why not the floor?" grumbled George. Molly just glared at her child, and from then on no one complained.**

**It wasn't until three days that the young witch sat up and opened her eyes.**

**Her black hair stuck to her white skin, and bags were under her eyes.**

"**Where am I?" She moaned. **

**Molly gave her a glass of water, and patted her head.**

"**You're at the burrow dear. You were passed out on your couch, I brought you here. How are you?"**

**The girl looked unsteady and tried to rise but sunk quickly to the couch. "Fine." She slurred. **

**Molly moved forward and patted her head kindly. "What happened dear?"**

**Severus shook her head widely, and started crying. To Molly's surprise she shook with sobs. Molly did not want her so upset while she was yet so weak. She turned to her husband, "Get her upstairs." **

**The young woman was easily picked up my Arthur, she hung limp in his hands. Molly followed Arthur to their room, where he lay her gently on the bed. The girl had stopped shaking now, but tears still fell.**

**Molly sat on the bed beside her, and rested the black haired witch's head on her lap. She stroked the damp hair and murmured calming things to her. Finally Severus tried to speak. **

"**Didn't mean to shoot up, I don't know what happened." She moaned.**

"**Shoot up?" Arthur gave Molly a confused look. Molly was equally puzzled. Molly has been talking about the cuts on her arm.**

**Severus did not catch on. "Withdrawals are a bitch." She slurred. **

**Molly has thought she had the flu. "You mean to tell me you actually-" She started to scold, but stopped. Severus was not in the best shape.**

**She sighed, and lightened her tone. "What about these?" She asked, lightly tracing the red lines.**

**The girl remained stonily silent, but the tears increased.**

"**I didn't mean to do so many, I promise. " She whispered. The girl clutched her hand, Molly gripped back. Even Arthur knelt down and smoothed black hair away.**

**Pain-filled black eyes met Molly's. Molly frowned and wiped tears away. **

"**Tell me what's wrong." She pleaded. "You'll feel better."**

"**Isn't it obvious?" **

"**Oh, honey. Why are you hurting yourself?" Molly asked, feeling sorry for the young woman. Life had been very hard on her. **

**The woman just started to cry harder, thick tears fell quickly. **

"**Talk to me." She coaxed the younger witch.**

**The girl babbled and spat words out and eventually Molly could guess at what was wrong.**

""**Sirius? Did he say something mean? You just need to ignore him, dear. " Molly patter her hair, and rubbed her back. "Arthur, be a dear and get some water for her."**

"**Molly? Why. Am. I. such. A bad. Person." She wailed, catching on sobs. Molly pulled the woman unto her lap and hugged tightly, rocking her slowly. **

"**You are not a bad person. You are very smart."**

"**You're lying!" **

"**You've had a very hard life, and I think that's made you hard. And sometimes you lash out. But you are not a bad person."**

**The girl shook her head in denial, but Molly held it firm against her chest. **

"**You need to calm yourself. Shh. You are a good person." She insisted, rubbing circles on her back. Arthur came back with the water and handed it to her she chugged down greedily. She sighed content and leaned heavily against Molly.**

"**Severus. Why don't you clean yourself up, and then come down for some supper?" Molly said.**

**The younger witch nodded her consent, and Molly and Arthur left, and went downstairs.**

Severus got up slowly, and crept along the hallways until she came to the bathroom of the burrow. She slunk in and locked the door, and started the shower up. She threw off her sweaty clothing and rubbed her skin raw. She was still unsure of how many days she had been out of it, but she did not care much at the moment.

Finally clean, she slunk out of the shower, and sighed happily at the clean feeling. Her only annoyance was the fact that she had to put on that filthy piece of clothing again- but she would change soon enough. She looked in the mirror, and flinched. She had always been skinny, but the ribs and hips jarred out, and her eye bags could hold a gallon each. She ignored the annoyance she felt at shooting up- what had she been thinking? She pattered down the steps- as light as a cat, and slipped into the kitchen. Yummy smells assaulted her nose, and she almost smiled.

"She lives." Molly smiled, pulling out a chair and ushering her in. She sank down, and ignore the looks the children gave her. She was in no mood, and too weak to glare- she settled for staring at the table.

"Eat up." Molly sang, and the children all started to eat the delicious ham, and mashed potatoes. Severus dug in also, but did not let herself use poor table manners. She had not been brought up that way. It was delicious and he savored the flavor, delighting in it.

Finally though, she could eat no more, and she stood.

"Thanks for supper Molly, Good day."


	10. Chapter 10

Severus woke the next day, and slunk into a pretty white dress. She threw on make-up and shoved her hair in a quick pony tail. She felt much better after yesterday, Molly was very comforting. She yawned and smiled, today would be a good day. Nothing would bring her down. She felt great, and did not feel gay. She had come to terms with this change. Permanent or not, she would embrace it. She grabbed Remus's potion and after a quick check to make sure her cuts were covered, she flooed to Molly's to give it to him.

She knocked on the door and Molly let him in, leading him to the kitchen. Remus was sitting there along with Black and Tonks. She frowned at the mutt, but took it off her face when she turned to Remus and handed out the bottle.

"Here." She said, yawning.

Tonks yawned right after. "Stop that. It's contagious!" She grumbled.

"What's wrong Nymphadora?" She grinned, evilly," Were you up all night with the wolves?" She raised a black brow at her.

Tonks stuck her tongue out. "Were you out with the dogs all night?" She retorted.

"Touché."

Remus gave a confused look, along with Molly.

Tonks and her burst out laughing. Severus did not mean too, but he could not help it. Her real laugh came. He hated his real laugh; it was like Santa hopped up on laughing gas. It was embarrassing. Everyone stopped momentarily and stared, but her laugher was infectious, rare- but contagious.

"Oh Wow." Tonks laughed.

Sirius was on the floor laughing, tears in his eyes, and the children(who had walked in) were now laughing too. Tears ran down who face- it was too much, she could hardly breathe.

Severus was now on her knees and clutching her gut.

"Stop!" Sirius begged.

Finally, after a long time, the laughing subsided.

"Holy crap, what was that?" Tonks giggled.

Severus wiped tears away, and smiled. "A laugh, obviously." She drawled.

"That is some laugh." Sirius said.

Severus wanted to glare, but could not. Mirth filled her blood and she was euphoric.

"Oh, hey. While you're here…I need to talk to you." The mutt said.

Severus placed a hand on her hip. "I don't want to talk to you." She turned, and walked outside. Sun beat on her skin. She was just pulling her wand up to appirate when a strong hand tugged her around.

It was the damn anamagi. "Look, just listen okay." He sounded reluctant, and a little worried.

"What?" She drawled out.

Sirius locked big black eyes on hers, she was captivated. She felt her heart speed and wanted it to stop to tell it to behave, but it beat on.

"I'm sorry, okay? This is just…weird. I mean you. You used to be a male you know. And then when we got together…Look Tonks told me how much of-"

"How much of a jerk you were?" She cut in.

Sirius looked angry for a moment then softened his look. "Why do you always do that? You attack people before they even say anything?"

Severus wanted to deny it. But it was true. "Everybody always attacks me, I just throw the first punch."

Sirius frowned. "That's the thing tough," His eyes burned into hers, "Sometimes people aren't attacking you, and you just lash out."

Severus looked away at the ground. "Better safe than sorry." She said quietly.

"Why does it have to be so black and white?" Sirius grabbed her hand.

"I don't make the rules." She insisted.

Sirius moved closer, and the smell of him made her dizzy with want. "That doesn't mean you can't break them."

"I don't know how." She whispered.

"Let me help."

Lips pressed to hers, and she pressed back. Her heart was going overdrive, and she was flying. To the moon and back and all the way to Heaven. She was not going to worry about anything, not care. She was going to be her. She would smile and laugh.

"Stop hating me." Sirius begged.

She smiled. "Why?"

"Cause I'd really love to date you."

"I think we can work something out." She agreed, kissing him hard.

She would love Sirius also, and it would be okay.


End file.
